Do you know what you blabber? The best real life instances (

by **vivek of themavericks** » Thu Jan 02, 2003 4:48 pm

Many a times we get so excited with event(s) that happen in life that we forget to maintain a synergy between our tongue (act) and our mind. Suddenly it seems then, that we have spoken before we could actually figure out what she we need to utter. This new year, i pay a tribute to all those times of goof-ups that found a way in. Presenting the best or say the worst times when I or my pals or those who i overheard did a daring act of talking garbage. 

 Instance 1 After paying a visit to my dad\'s old time pal\'s son\'s wedding, something prompted me to blabber \"Many many happy returns of the day...!,\" and the bride\'s eyes just popped out. Instance 2 Me and my college pal could not make it to our common pal\'s wedding, the bride\'s mom then asked, \"Why did\'t you both come that day, we had so much fun.\" My pal then committed his rare blabber act \"Sorry aunty, next time pucca ..i will come.\" Instance 3 My pal wanted me to go with to send a telegram to condole the untimely death of his sister\'s hubby\'s granpa. I told him to avoid thinking a message and just type the Indian telegram

number code.Each number stands for a certain type of message. By pure negligence, he typed No 17. and sent. I then released No 17 stands for \" Wishing the new couple

a happy wedded life\" Instance 4 My friend in college wrote two letters, one for his dad and a totally sentimental letter to his girl friend. He posted the dad\'s

letter to his GF and Vice - versa. Today, he is engaged to the same girl dads ok with it!. Good one eh. Instance 5 My long time aquintant confessed that he

had a crush on this girl in his class, whom he is still in touch. Now, this guy was a big time duffer, weak in english. I and my pals prompted him to ask her out. The guy then

tought of writting her a letter. I can just paste the letter here, but may be some other time. But there were these lines, which was ironically funny . They went \" I non you for

very long time, i like you very much, you are my best friend and make my life soft like rose. You also smell well, which makes me smell you more. YOURS are so good\" .

Now the last line gotta be, you are so good and he probably thought of doing some olympics just like, they would = they\'d. Would not = would\'nt and You are =

YOUR!!???. Instance 6 In our MBA class, we were asked to do an impromtu on public speaking for motivation, my class mate then goes to the dias and starts

to speak on the role woman can play in Indian corporates. I guess she wanted to be innovate so she said, \" everywhere the body bulges, there is fat, and whereever there is

fat there is energy.It is a biologically proven fact that women have more fat than men, then what makes us stay behind.....(the whole crap here)....In the end i would like to

say that we women should not ignore our bulges and be proud of them and try to make our stored energy lead us\". Damn, she was not even drunk, when why the hell i

wondered. She was very intelligent. Cause literally i felt, whatever she said is true for women only Instance 7 This ones on me, i admitt that i talk rubbish with 4

bottles down beer, the problem is i am single and NOT looking so that adds to the kick (don\'t ask how) . We were in this pub with 3 other boys and 2 girls. One of em\' was

from Germany, as we went on talking she reminded, \" hey! you have not even once gone to the mens room inspite of gulping 4 bottles \" I blabbered ( justified guys ), Ya i

usually have guts of steel and lotsa balls \". My pal spit the whole beer on the other guy\'s shirt as he burst out laughing. Instance 8 In a super market, me and

my pal went to purchase a mosquito repelent machine. The girl in the shop then reccomended us a machine that runs for 12hrs non stop. My pal then blabbered \" nahi, i

need something to run in the night, mai raath ko hi machcharon ko MARVATHA hoon!!\" . Instance 9 A busy shopping mall in hyd, and a north indian lady trying

to park the car, the fellow at the parking lot starts to directed her to place the car in the right place . \" achcha..aandho..aandho..chalo dabhao...dabhao..peeche loo...aur

peeche...abhi jarra dabhao..aisa...aando...aisa..side ko lo...dabhao..ok madam, ticket please! \".The lady was clearly new to town and perplexed. Legend for this, Aando

- keep reversing, dabhao - keep going, side ko lo - Keep left. Instance 10 Can\'t think of any at the moment

by **vivek of themavericks** » Thu Jan 02, 2003 4:52 pm

Real life can at times become so unbelievably funny, that it becomes important to remember those times. Especially when you are sad or distrubed. Instances in our life itself would provide the power to support ourselves in times of crisis, we just have to look for clues.

by **Gulmohar Hyderabadi** » Fri Jan 03, 2003 8:44 am

hey vivek, keep posting your borads. They are sort of a breath of fresh air compared to the godhra trash and other sentimental junk.
Anyways, drop in@ sandya_mallya@hotmail.com

by **neeraj** » Fri Jan 03, 2003 11:00 am

Hivivek. gr8 yaar, i really enjoyed the blabbers,,,

well it really cools of the mind, looking forward for more 10s to come yaar, keep it upppp. i suddenly laugh loud in my office also, my collegues eyebrows going up...

by **vivek of themavericks** » Sat Jan 04, 2003 12:45 pm

Thanks, even i feel the same, we need some relaxants to relieve us of the tensions in life. I would be glad if you guys could add your own examples. For those who don\'t like my boards, they have an option of not participating and that option is free. I would like them to exercise the same.

by **akhilis2cool** » Wed Apr 07, 2004 8:09 pm

vivek of themavericks wrote:Many a times we get so excited with event(s) that happen in life that we forget to maintain a synergy between our tongue (act) and our mind. Suddenly it seems then, that we have spoken before we could actually figure out what she we need to utter. This new year, i pay a tribute to all those times of goof-ups that found a way in. Presenting the best or say the worst times when I or my pals or those who i overheard did a daring act of talking garbage. 

 Instance 1 After paying a visit to my dad's old time pal's son's wedding, something prompted me to blabber "Many many happy returns of the day...!," and the bride's eyes just popped out. Instance 2 Me and my college pal could not make it to our common pal's wedding, the bride's mom then asked, "Why did't you both come that day, we had so much fun." My pal then committed his rare blabber act "Sorry aunty, next time pucca ..i will come." Instance 3 My pal wanted me to go with to send a telegram to condole the untimely death of his sister's hubby's granpa. I told him to avoid thinking a message and just type the Indian telegram

number code.Each number stands for a certain type of message. By pure negligence, he typed No 17. and sent. I then released No 17 stands for " Wishing the new couple

a happy wedded life" Instance 4 My friend in college wrote two letters, one for his dad and a totally sentimental letter to his girl friend. He posted the dad's

letter to his GF and Vice - versa. Today, he is engaged to the same girl dads ok with it!. Good one eh. Instance 5 My long time aquintant confessed that he

had a crush on this girl in his class, whom he is still in touch. Now, this guy was a big time duffer, weak in english. I and my pals prompted him to ask her out. The guy then

tought of writting her a letter. I can just paste the letter here, but may be some other time. But there were these lines, which was ironically funny . They went " I non you for

very long time, i like you very much, you are my best friend and make my life soft like rose. You also smell well, which makes me smell you more. YOURS are so good" .

Now the last line gotta be, you are so good and he probably thought of doing some olympics just like, they would = they'd. Would not = would'nt and You are =

YOUR!!???. Instance 6 In our MBA class, we were asked to do an impromtu on public speaking for motivation, my class mate then goes to the dias and starts

to speak on the role woman can play in Indian corporates. I guess she wanted to be innovate so she said, " everywhere the body bulges, there is fat, and whereever there is

fat there is energy.It is a biologically proven fact that women have more fat than men, then what makes us stay behind.....(the whole crap here)....In the end i would like to

say that we women should not ignore our bulges and be proud of them and try to make our stored energy lead us". Damn, she was not even drunk, when why the hell i

wondered. She was very intelligent. Cause literally i felt, whatever she said is true for women only Instance 7 This ones on me, i admitt that i talk rubbish with 4

bottles down beer, the problem is i am single and NOT looking so that adds to the kick (don't ask how) . We were in this pub with 3 other boys and 2 girls. One of em' was

from Germany, as we went on talking she reminded, " hey! you have not even once gone to the mens room inspite of gulping 4 bottles " I blabbered ( justified guys ), Ya i

usually have guts of steel and lotsa balls ". My pal spit the whole beer on the other guy's shirt as he burst out laughing. Instance 8 In a super market, me and

my pal went to purchase a mosquito repelent machine. The girl in the shop then reccomended us a machine that runs for 12hrs non stop. My pal then blabbered " nahi, i

need something to run in the night, mai raath ko hi machcharon ko MARVATHA hoon!!" . Instance 9 A busy shopping mall in hyd, and a north indian lady trying

to park the car, the fellow at the parking lot starts to directed her to place the car in the right place . " achcha..aandho..aandho..chalo dabhao...dabhao..peeche loo...aur

peeche...abhi jarra dabhao..aisa...aando...aisa..side ko lo...dabhao..ok madam, ticket please! ".The lady was clearly new to town and perplexed. Legend for this, Aando

- keep reversing, dabhao - keep going, side ko lo - Keep left. Instance 10 Can't think of any at the moment

I too this habit(recurring) of saying good night when ever take someones leave.

i once called lakdi-ka-pul Ladki-ka-pul

:shock:

by ZC » Thu Apr 08, 2004 10:01 am

n i used to think it was lakdi Kapoor :roll:

like Raj Kapoor................ajeeb naam hain rey........i thought :roll:

by **mysterious babe** » Thu Apr 08, 2004 11:07 am

vivek it was quite nice reading ur posts. I hardly remember any of my funny instances though when i have to look back i realise when i m with my freinds we r laughing all the time (mostly pulling each others leg). So next time i m gonna remember what we were laughing about and defintiely post it.

by **Happy Hyderabadi** » Thu Apr 08, 2004 2:10 pm

vivek of themavericks wrote:Many a times we get so excited with event(s) that happen in life that we forget to maintain a synergy between our tongue (act) and our mind. Suddenly it seems then, that we have spoken before we could actually figure out what she we need to utter.

Here are a few "real" life examples of what others "Blabber":

* I was flying from Bombay to Pune ... with whom I was in tow, I looked around. There was this Shashi Kapur, the one and only, the Hero in Demand ... we land in Pune ... Only S K is being greeted and received:

'Welcome to BOMBAY, Sir!"

Some Chamcha, must have been that !

* A VIP inaugurates: By virtue of the Authority ... "Wasted" in me ...

(For "vested", obviously)

* Our "Facilitations" to our Honoured Patron ...

(For "Felicilations", clearly) and that too in the Banner!

* We are "Greatful" to Our "Grate" Guest of Honour ...

(In "(P)Roof Reading" one can Correct by noting "Trans (Transposing)", but when already Spoken, where's the Remedy!

by **azazel** » Thu Apr 08, 2004 8:33 pm

my pal at my bro's wedding goes up on the stage to greet him after the ceremony, while hugging him says , Eid Mubarak :!:

all the ppl standin there burst out laughing ..

by **CtrlAltDel** » Thu Apr 08, 2004 9:12 pm

tho i can understand, read n write telugu, i am not that fast while speaking. i have to compile every word before saying it!

long ago my neighbor had taken ill. i met her to enquire after her health.

i had intended to say "Aunty, Ontlo ela vundhi?"

instead i blurted "Aunty, Ollu ela vundhi?"

i am sure her's and other's laughter proved to be the best medicine for her!

by **azazel** » Fri Apr 09, 2004 8:19 pm

this happened to my sis when she was doin her B.Sc in Anwar ul Uloom, Nampally.. one fine morning she was goin up to her class n one of the numerous typical loafers

just saw her, caught his heart n fell down..

she said she was too embarassed to even move.. :lol:

by **Tiger** » Wed Jul 07, 2004 6:07 pm

Here's one that I heard recently:

At a wedding, the groom when reciting his vows said: "I take you to be my awful wife from this day forward" instead of "I take you to be my lawful wife from this day forward"

Do you know what you blabber? The best real life instances (