Thursday, 28 March 2024 »  Login
in

Arranged or Love marriage

Friendship, love, live-in and extra-marital relationships, marriage, family - share the views of diverse people on everything that makes up life.

Moderator: The Moderator Team

What do you prefer

1)Arrange Marriage
6
32%
2)Love Marriage
8
42%
3)Dont marry be happy
3
16%
4)Undecided Unmarried
2
11%
 
Total votes : 19

Arranged or Love marriage

by sara » Wed Jun 07, 2006 7:49 pm

Although Western socities tend to deride arranged marriages as backward and uncivilized and primitive, there do exist positive aspects. For example, Westerners focus more on the physical aspect of relationships, and are thus obsessed with love, sex, beauty, etc. As a result, people get married based on these factors and then get disenchanted with one another very easily. The divorce rate in Western countries such as the U.S. has skyrocketed. […]In contrast, Eastern cultures that practice arranged marriages place far more emphasis on the practical, such as integrity, diligence, ambition, humility, generosity, etc. People get married based on practical reasons, and work on building affection later. Strong characteristics like the ones described above are very conducive to building love and affection in Eastern marriages. As a result, these marriages are much longer-lasting than many Western marriages (at least, based on what i’ve seen so far). It’s BECAUSE the primary emphasis is NOT on love, sex, and physical beauty that arranged marriages are usually so successful, because the spouses get to know one another on a practical level first, looking beyond trivial issues such as beauty or lack thereof.

And, of course, i know it can go both ways: there ARE many arranged marriages that are just total hell, and there are marriages that started out based only on infatuation and grew stronger as time passed. But I think as long one as looks for the right characteristics in a potential spouse, then, arranged marriage or not, ‘s all good.

lets see what our forum members have to say HONESTLY
women who compete with men seem to lack ambition.
User avatar
sara
Registered User
 
Posts: 41
Joined: Sun Jun 04, 2006 7:45 pm

by mAnOmAn » Wed Jun 07, 2006 8:09 pm

Love or dating where a young man and woman (or boy/girl) are in a one-on-one intimate relationship, spending time together alone, "getting to know each other" in a very deep way before deciding whether that's the person they will marry.



What if after knowing each other in all possible days one fine day decide they dont suit each other . what will be the effect on life after some say half a dozen of such failed relations.



Nothing against love marriage or arranged marriage but some decicions in life have to be taken while considering lot of factors . Not jumping to conclusions and regretting everafter.





The choice of a marriage partner is one of the most important decisions a person will make in his or her lifetime. It should not be taken lightly, nor left to chance or hormones. It should be taken as seriously as any other major decision in life - careful investigation, and family involvement.



offcourse there shud be compatibility but u cannot take a trial for everything, same as u never decided to whom u wanted to be born too, or selected ur sibling but u love them the most.



I am undecided hence unmarried but gud topic lets see the opinions of other members
There is a wrong way of doing things, there is a right way of doing things and there is MY way ........
User avatar
mAnOmAn
Registered User
 
Posts: 89
Joined: Mon Apr 03, 2006 8:56 pm
Location: 22'36" Latitude ::34'52" longitude

by Akshay » Wed Jun 07, 2006 9:22 pm

The acceptance of diverse lifestyles in the subject society affects the success rates of marriages. When we talk about arranged marriages we talk predominant marriages in eastern society alone. So, I will compare what allows the statistially higher success of eastern marriages versus those of western marriages. My point is not to put one society over the other but to highlight that statistics do not capture the whole story.



In eastern societies divorce, single motherhood, and aged singles are frowned upon. These are non issues in western societies. Spousal abuse is a prosecutable crime yet an accepted norm in eastern societies; it is a prosecuted crime in western societies. Families provide social security in eastern societies, govt does that in Western societies. Individual dignity is of most importance in western societies, family dignity is the case for eastern societies. Each spouse has an independent life of his/her own in addition to the marriage in western societies, this is mostly not true in eastern societies.



In a lot of cases incompatible spousal relationships sustain in eastern societies because of lack of alternatives; this shows as a positive marriage statistically. The available alternatives encourages the spouses to opt for the impulsive/easy/necessary path of divorce in western societies; this shows as a negative marriage statistically.



So any comparison between arranged and love marriages has to account for both quality and quantity. I think at that point we might find both kinds of marriages, love and arranged, have equal likelihood of success. After all, the marriage is between two individuals and they are the same wether they go through arranged or love marriage.
God is a comedian playing to an audience too afraid to laugh. Voltaire, philosopher (1694-1778)
Akshay
Registered User
 
Posts: 262
Joined: Sat Aug 27, 2005 3:58 pm
Location: ramcastle

Re: Arranged or Love marriage

by KK » Thu Jun 08, 2006 12:42 am

sara wrote:Although Western socities tend to deride arranged marriages as backward and uncivilized and primitive, there do exist positive aspects.


You betcha :D , afterall you dont have to struggle to find a gurl :lol:
User avatar
KK
Registered User
 
Posts: 355
Joined: Wed Jul 13, 2005 2:51 am

Re: Arranged or Love marriage

by Darlene Hill » Fri Feb 25, 2011 9:23 pm

Sara!
debate over Arrange or Love marriage is like a never ending story...both have success rates!
But let me tell one thing about Eastern & Western Marriages...A BITTER FACT!
You know why there is lower divorce ratio in Eastern World...mainly what I think is because of Male dominance & Women are lacking in empowerment...they are afraid of that If they leave their hubbies from where they can eat...they rely on their husband for food and everything..that is why they are keep avoiding divorce decision...because this can prove to be fatal one for them..because they are lacking in education...social awareness etc...In West the case is opposite and Women are empowered!
It is not about Arrange or Love...it is about empowerment baby!
I do agree due to this higher divorce factor: Last minute wedding concept is getting popular in west!
User avatar
Darlene Hill
Registered User
 
Posts: 5
Joined: Wed Feb 09, 2011 9:38 pm
Location: cedar, UTAH, USA

Re: Arranged or Love marriage

by shesaidjews? » Mon Apr 11, 2011 6:42 pm

I would rather focus on career first and then love/arranged/marriage.

once if u get good job/good career there are no worries.

there is no need to search for guys/girls they automatically come to u.

even same for arranged marriages once u have good career u get tonnes of people to ask match.

just rushing into anything always FAILS.....just be patient and wait u always get what u want.

if u DON'T rush love or even arranged marriage will be 100% successful.
shesaidjews?
Registered User
 
Posts: 3
Joined: Mon Apr 11, 2011 6:23 pm

Re: Arranged or Love marriage

by 2power10 » Tue Apr 12, 2011 11:26 am

affidavit wrote:I would rather focus on career first and then love/arranged/marriage.

once if u get good job/good career there are no worries.

there is no need to search for guys/girls they automatically come to u.

even same for arranged marriages once u have good career u get tonnes of people to ask match.

just rushing into anything always FAILS.....just be patient and wait u always get what u want.

if u DON'T rush love or even arranged marriage will be 100% successful.


@shesaidjews: seriously? the question is, do the people we WANT come to us if our career is set? or is it again a futile wait for the ones we want?
2power10
Registered User
 

Re: Arranged or Love marriage

by teliraja » Tue Apr 12, 2011 12:13 pm

It is not a matter of Arranged or Love marriage.

If you go by statistics, the majority of marriages are arranged by parents.

Love marriages are like Lead pencils which have an expiry date of the marriage.
teliraja
Registered User
 
Posts: 16
Joined: Tue Aug 10, 2010 4:01 pm

Re: Arranged or Love marriage

by aaliya » Thu Apr 21, 2011 4:13 pm

I completely believe in Love Marriage, I think this is the best to choose every time, By any of the person.
aaliya
Registered User
 
Posts: 4
Joined: Thu Apr 21, 2011 4:09 pm

Re: Arranged or Love marriage

by Liz » Fri Apr 22, 2011 4:51 pm

I chose "Don't marry be happy", but I would certainly marry someone I love... :)
Liz
Registered User
 
Posts: 3
Joined: Fri Apr 22, 2011 4:47 pm

Re: Arranged or Love marriage

by roggers » Wed Jun 08, 2011 4:07 pm

I am also for "don't marry be happy" it's by far the best alternative. Nevertheless, I'll only marry to make my partner happy although I don't think we need marriage to be happy.
roggers
Registered User
 
Posts: 3
Joined: Wed Jun 08, 2011 3:52 pm

Re: Arranged or Love marriage

by Human Relationships » Wed Jul 13, 2011 11:25 pm

An arranged marriage is an practice in which one in which someone other than the couple getting married makes the selection of the persons to be wed, meanwhile curtailing or avoiding the process of courtship. Such marriages had deep roots in royal and aristocratic families around the world. Today, arranged marriage is largely practiced in South Asia ,Africa, the Middle East, and Southeast Asia and East Asia to some extent. Other groups that practice this custom include the Unification Church and Hasidic Jewry.


thanks,
Human Relationships
Registered User
 
Posts: 6
Joined: Tue Sep 14, 2010 1:27 am

Re: Arranged or Love marriage

by Ankush » Wed Aug 17, 2011 5:45 pm

The thrill and excitement in case of arranged marriage is much more, as compared to the love marriage, because one needs to work on knowing the person, from the very starting of the marriage, to make the marriage a comfortable journey to walk in.
Ankush
Registered User
 
Posts: 2
Joined: Wed Aug 17, 2011 5:38 pm
Location: Noida

Re: Arranged or Love marriage

by marriage programming.:) » Fri Nov 04, 2011 5:22 pm

i believe love marriage is a It is a throwaway type of prototype as client requirements rises with time thus it is a dynamic system and difficult to maintain. and when it's arrange marriage Requirements are well defined so use of waterfall model is possible. :wink:
marriage programming.:)
Registered User
 
Posts: 3
Joined: Tue Nov 01, 2011 7:36 pm

Re: Arranged or Love marriage

by imagebo » Tue Nov 08, 2011 3:20 pm

A love marriage is a union of two individuals based upon mutual love, affection, commitment and attraction. While the term has little discrete meaning in the Western world, where most marriages are considered to be 'based in love,' the term has meaning elsewhere to indicate a concept of marriage which differs from the norms of arranged marriage and forced marriage.

The term has found usage in South Asia and Middle-Eastern countries which have strong traditional arranged marriage systems —where the family of the woman, the man, or of both, arrange the marriage for the individuals.

Depending on the culture, love marriages may be unpopular or frowned upon.
imagebo
Registered User
 
Posts: 11
Joined: Tue Nov 08, 2011 12:11 pm

Re: Arranged or Love marriage

by James Johnston » Sat Nov 12, 2011 2:15 am

Although Western socities tend to deride arranged marriages as backward and uncivilized and primitive


I must disagree, historically prearranged marriages were very common in western society until 19th - early 20th century, and were completely root out by sexual revolution and feminist movement.

As a marriage adviser at http://howtosaveyourmarriage.co, I must say that divorce rate has nothing to do with prearrangement or absence of them, but with culture. American culture and and education has degraded over past decades. Most couples don't marry out of love, but out of fear losing each other and lack of independence. Most people are lonely in US, and if they happen to find somebody with common interests and stablw, they tend to marry. Passion is a rarity.

It is very different in Europe, especially in eastern European countries like Russia, Ukraine, Poland and others. People tend to be more traditional here, and role of women is different. Women still cook, look after the house and expect doors to be open and chairs pulled. Couples tend not to date for long time just for sex, and marry on average in early 20s. Couples in Europe also have babies earlier, which helps to hold marriage together. Also I must say parents play a huge role unlike America. I think what we can see in Eastern Europe is a golden middle between to opposites.
User avatar
James Johnston
Registered User
 
Posts: 2
Joined: Sat Nov 12, 2011 1:46 am
Location: USA

Re: Arranged or Love marriage

by siddhant » Sun Feb 19, 2012 1:18 pm

I would prefer having a Live-in relationship. As in such kind of relationship i can get much more space as compared to marriage..
siddhant
Registered User
 
Posts: 13
Joined: Sun Feb 19, 2012 12:18 pm

Re: Arranged or Love marriage

by A heartbroken GUY » Mon Feb 20, 2012 9:41 pm

Re: Arranged or Love marriage

I would prefer having a Live-in relationship. As in such kind of relationship i can get much more space as compared to marriage..


Looking for cool replies....from women. Men: be free to respond.....don't be shy or negative minded.....
A heartbroken GUY
Registered User
 
Posts: 14
Joined: Fri Feb 17, 2012 10:22 pm

Re: Arranged or Love marriage

by jhenna » Wed Mar 07, 2012 8:29 pm

I'd rather go to love marriage cause i'm a Cristian and that's our belief. What is marriage w/out love!
jhenna
Registered User
 
Posts: 2
Joined: Wed Jan 18, 2012 3:49 pm

Re: Arranged or Love marriage

by Kavya » Thu May 17, 2012 3:57 pm

Hi All
"Every Coin Has Two Sides". So same is here, there are some good and some bad in Arranged as well as Love Marriage.
In Love Marriage, we know well our partner. So after marriage, the life doesn't change so much. But only love is not enough to drive the car of life. There are other things also, like money, relatives. In most of the love marriages, parents are not agreed. I think if you do love someone and your parents are agreed, then go for marriage, otherwise come out from that relationship. I have seen lot of cases, in which parents were not agreed but the pair ran away and did marriage. Now they are facing lot of problems, no one comes to help them. Life is a precious gift of God, we must not destory it, just enjoy.
In Arranged Marriage, even we dont know our partner, we have respect for him/her. Parents choose our partner, and they know the world better than us. But there are some greedy people in our society, they torture the girl for dawry and make her life hell. I am not saying that girls are not bad, some girls are bad. They have relationship before marriage and same for boys also. Parents want to marry as soon as possible, they think that after marriage everything will be fine. But it doesnt happen.
If we go through the statics, then Arranged Marriages are more successfull than Love Marriages. There could be some reason behind it. In my personal view, the best marriage is Love Cum Arrange, in which everybody is agreed.
Kavya
Registered User
 
Posts: 4
Joined: Tue May 15, 2012 3:10 pm

Re: Arranged or Love marriage

by Curious » Sun May 20, 2012 2:13 pm

Neighter Love nor Arranged, this is same as person dye natural or suicide....ultimate Death will be there. :roll:

:D
Curious
Registered User
 
Posts: 3
Joined: Sun May 20, 2012 2:11 pm

Re: Arranged or Love marriage

by Kartheek » Wed May 30, 2012 4:56 pm

Hi All

I was born and brought up in the US, recently moved to Hyderabad.
I am a very career oriented person and would rather prefer my parents arranged my marriage as opposed to me searching for the elusive 'one'.
My opinion is, people change/ dont change whatever it is, is going to be the same whether you found your spouse or somebody did it for you.
By that i of course mean that i will want to know this person who my parents would have chosen for me.
What do you think?
Kartheek
Registered User
 
Posts: 1
Joined: Wed May 30, 2012 4:47 pm

Re: Arranged or Love marriage

by vandetor » Fri Apr 26, 2013 4:30 pm

i always support love marriage
vandetor
Registered User
 
Posts: 3
Joined: Fri Apr 26, 2013 4:16 pm

Re: Arranged or Love marriage

by Richard » Sat Jun 08, 2013 5:04 am

Kartheek wrote:Hi All

I was born and brought up in the US, recently moved to Hyderabad.
I am a very career oriented person and would rather prefer my parents arranged my marriage as opposed to me searching for the elusive 'one'.
My opinion is, people change/ dont change whatever it is, is going to be the same whether you found your spouse or somebody did it for you.
By that i of course mean that i will want to know this person who my parents would have chosen for me.
What do you think?


Guys, it's depends on what kind of person you meet, wether it's LOVE or ARRANGED. I am never though of LOVE marriage but I met right person at 30s and I am happy now. I don't think my parents couple get better girl than her.

I suggest, if you find right girl, convince your parents or look for arranged marriage but sure that person is down to earth and have all qualities what you are looking for.

Here is some good info.

http://cocktailcontent.blogspot.com.au/ ... girls.html

http://cocktailcontent.blogspot.com.au/ ... -life.html
Richard
Registered User
 
Posts: 6
Joined: Tue Dec 25, 2012 7:22 am



Return to Human Relationships

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 5 guests

cron
ADVERTISEMENT
SHOUTBOX!
{{todo.name}}
{{todo.date}}
[
]
{{ todo.summary }}... expand »
{{ todo.text }} « collapse
First  |  Prev  |   1   2  3  {{current_page-1}}  {{current_page}}  {{current_page+1}}  {{last_page-2}}  {{last_page-1}}  {{last_page}}   |  Next  |  Last
{{todos[0].name}}

{{todos[0].text}}

ADVERTISEMENT
This page was tagged for
why do some girls opt out of love
love marraiage online registation hyd
help me in getting love marriage in hyderabad
love marriage in hyderabad
love marriages in hyderabad
Follow fullhyd.com on
Copyright © 2023 LRR Technologies (Hyderabad) Pvt Ltd. All rights reserved. fullhyd and fullhyderabad are registered trademarks of LRR Technologies (Hyderabad) Pvt Ltd. The textual, graphic, audio and audiovisual material in this site is protected by copyright law. You may not copy, distribute or use this material except as necessary for your personal, non-commercial use. Any trademarks are the properties of their respective owners.