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Would you marry a Phirangi ?

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Re: Phirangi's

by mango » Wed Jul 26, 2006 9:52 pm

CTC wrote:I am not in love with skin color. White or black or brown is immaterial if one looks at inner beauty (character).




THANK YOU!!! godd.. not everyone's shallow.
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by Neelyma » Wed Oct 25, 2006 2:49 am

It's really not as easy as it looks like. Deep down there will be a gap in the relationship which forms as you cannot share some traditional values, history and the environment you were brought up in from both sides.

The cultural barriers can be broken with love but only to some extent. Personally I can't see myself sharing with some body, who can't relate to what I am saying or feeling.

Not that all desi's understand each other :roll: . Atleast to some extent I bet.
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by Portuguese Man-Of-War » Thu Oct 26, 2006 11:46 am

Neelyma wrote:It's really not as easy as it looks like. Deep down there will be a gap in the relationship which forms as you cannot share some traditional values, history and the environment you were brought up in from both sides.
The cultural barriers can be broken with love but only to some extent. Personally I can't see myself sharing with some body, who can't relate to what I am saying or feeling.
Not that all desi's understand each other :roll: . Atleast to some extent I bet.


Does your observation come from experience or logic?



Cross-cultural relationships depend a lot on how much maturity the partners have ("have", not just "demonstrate" - in the long run, having maturity is more important than just artificially demonstrating it through knowledgeable-looking silences and nods, and correct utterances).



Maturity defined as trust, and a capability to at least not judge even if it's hard to understand or empathize.



Actually, I guess that's true of all relationships :) .
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by Bubbles » Sat Oct 28, 2006 2:40 am

You need to be a bit extra mature and understanding if you are entering into a relation with someone from a different background. You should understand that person and know more about him/her before making the big decision. This holds good for any marriage. But in a broader sense, people from same background have similiar ideologies in their life, and you can kind of predict what kind of relation you will be in for. At least , no major differences in terms of lifestyle, ethics etc

What's right for you may not be so for your firangi. You will be in for a shock once you get to live with that person and you find out that his/her outlook is so different from yours. Yes, maturity plays a role in smoothening out any small differences. But you have to make sure there are not many of them.
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by PWOW » Tue Nov 14, 2006 2:51 pm

Portuguese Man-Of-War wrote:
Cross-cultural relationships depend a lot on how much maturity the partners have ("have", not just "demonstrate" - in the long run, having maturity is more important than just artificially demonstrating it through knowledgeable-looking silences and nods, and correct utterances).

Maturity defined as trust, and a capability to at least not judge even if it's hard to understand or empathize.

Actually, I guess that's true of all relationships :) .




And how does one build the trust without hearing or saying the right things, which are heartfelt? PMOW, you seem to know a lot about relationships, any tips for people going through a huge break-up. I am still trying to figure out what went wrong in my relationship.
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by I is eloquent » Wed Nov 15, 2006 12:04 am

It all boils down to what two people share in a relationship and what they expect out of it. I have been going steady with a "phirangi" for about the past 5 years. We've had a lot of arguments and most of them had a lot to do with the cultural differences. In the end we still stuck together because of what we get out of our relationship. Many enter into a relationship for the namesake of having a boyfriend or a girlfriend. This approach is not really effective because you tend to find the wrong person for the job most of the time. But coming back the question of the thread. Would you marry a phirangi? The answer is, Yes. Provided I find what I expect of my wife in her. The race really doesn't matter.
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