Doesn't my avatar look like that
?
Anyway, since my little secret is out, here's an intro.
I first read about the Portuguese Man-Of-War in Tinkle when I was a kid ("Meet The Portuguese Man-Of-War"). Ever since, I wanted to be one. But unlike the rest of mankind, I did not stop with just wanting to be one. I started working hard for it.
I launched severe penances to propitiate the Lord. In the first 2 months, I lived only on herbs and wild berry. In the 3rd month, I moved to living just on water. In the 4th, I lived only on air. In the 5th and 6th, I stopped even breathing and concentrated on Him. Finally the Lord gave up and appeared in front of me.
I told him what I wanted, and He said yeah, yeah, He knew. He told me that He'll make me king of the entire planet instead, but I stuck to my guns. Then He upped it to king of all the three worlds, but I still did not yield. Then He went for the ultimate and said He'll make me a star. I still said no. Then He sat down resignedly and, wringing His hands in helplessness, said that it was simply not done. "I mean," He said, "look at how the tale will read! I converted a devotee who worked so hard to reach me into a ...a jellyfish? Sheesh, that's what happens if you upset some rishi's penance!"
I persisted, but the Lord politely turned down my request saying something about precedents, under-evolved choices, how it was so much more simple with the other kid, and how He missed the good old days. He told me to get in touch with Him whenever I changed my mind, and vanished.
Deeply disappointed, I then turned to the one that grants ALL requests - Gumba Golgumba (Lord Of The Dark World). In less than 3 months, I already had 36 tentacles. I am told I'm the highest performer yet, but I have a long way to go still, and am not letting all the praise get into my head.
For all you aspiring Portuguese Men-Of-War out there, I have this message: Yes, it's possible. You have to trust in Gumba Golgumba (Lord Of The Dark World), and take that first step. Best of luck!
