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Barkas Ki Haleem

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Joke

by Syed Adil » Tue Aug 22, 2006 1:35 pm

Joke:



A few months ago, there was an opening with the CIA for an

assassin. These highly classified positions are hard to fill,

and there’s a lot of testing and background checks involved

before you can even be considered for the position.



After sending some applicants through the background checks,

training and testing, they narrowed the possible choices down to

2 men and a woman, but only one position was available.



The day came for the final test to see which person would get

the extremely secretive job. The CIA men administering the test

took one of the men to a large metal door and handed him a gun.

“We must know that you will follow your instructions no matter

what the circumstances,” they explained. “Inside this room, you

will find your wife sitting in a chair. Take this gun and kill

her.”



The man got a shocked look on his face and said, “You can’t be

serious! I could never shoot my own wife!”



“Well,” says the CIA man, “you’re definitely not the right man

for this job then.”



So they bring the second man to the same door and hand him a

gun. “We must know that you will follow instructions no matter

what the circumstances,” they explained to the second man.

“Inside you will find your wife sitting in a chair. Take this

gun and kill her.”



The second man looked a bit shocked, but nonetheless took the

gun and went in the room. All was quiet for about 5 minutes,

then the door opened. The man came out of the room with tears in

his eyes. “I tried to shoot her, I just couldn’t pull the

trigger and shoot my wife. I guess I’m not the right man for the

job.”



“No,” the CIA man replied, “You don’t have what it takes. Take

your wife and go home.”



Now they’re down to the woman left to test. Again they lead her

to the same door to the same room and hand her the same gun. “We

must be sure that you will follow instructions no matter what

the circumstances, this is your final test. Inside you will find

your husband sitting in a chair. Take this gun and kill him.”



The woman took the gun and opened the door. Once the door

closed, the CIA heard the gun start firing. One shot after

another for 13 shots. Then all hell broke loose in the room.

They heard screaming, crashing, banging on the walls. This went

on for several minutes, then all went quiet.



The door opened slowly, and there stood the woman. She wiped the

sweat from her brow and said, “You guys didn’t tell me the gun

was loaded with blanks! I had to beat the bastard to death with

the chair!”
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sollekom bhai

by dhakkan » Thu Aug 24, 2006 3:00 pm

salaam bhai logo kya haal chalra sob ka?adil bhai pehli baat tumhaara joke english me hai aur uske baad itta bada hai hahahahahaahah lekin achcha tha
LiFe SuCkS!!!sO Do I!!!!!
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Re: sollekom bhai

by Syed Adil » Thu Aug 24, 2006 5:33 pm

dhakkan wrote:salaam bhai logo kya haal chalra sob ka?adil bhai pehli baat tumhaara joke english me hai aur uske baad itta bada hai hahahahahaahah lekin achcha tha




Wal dhakkan bhai



Apan ek dam firsht kilas hai Alhamdulillah.



Ghalti hogai ustaad wo kya hai na zara ghour nai kara mai ke isku urdu mei likhna tha bolke... khair aage se is baat ka khaas khayal rakha jayinga.... haur hyderabad ki kuch navi taazi khabar hai to sunaao....
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Barkaas ki Haleem

by VJ » Sat Aug 26, 2006 6:19 pm

Na mujhe Barkaas maalum, nahi Haleem kabhi khaya hai. Koi hame old city (heart of the city) dikha saktha hai? :?: :roll:



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kya hai yaaro vj ustaad!!!!!!

by dhakkan » Mon Aug 28, 2006 5:37 pm

hamaare vj bhai tum hyd me rehke barkas ku nai gaye?chalo barkas ku nai gaye toh nai gaye lekin old city ku bhi nai gaye?aray yaaaaro old city jaaaana kaisa bhi mast mazaaa aati lekin zara malumaat wale aadmi ku leke jao nahi toh old city me chutiya banaaane wale bhot rehte mai bhi bana thode baar :lol:
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Re: kya hai yaaro vj ustaad!!!!!!

by Syed Adil » Mon Aug 28, 2006 7:11 pm

dhakkan wrote:hamaare vj bhai tum hyd me rehke barkas ku nai gaye?chalo barkas ku nai gaye toh nai gaye lekin old city ku bhi nai gaye?aray yaaaaro old city jaaaana kaisa bhi mast mazaaa aati lekin zara malumaat wale aadmi ku leke jao nahi toh old city me chutiya banaaane wale bhot rehte mai bhi bana thode baar :lol:




Dhakkan miya tum bhi yaaro khaali peeli darare bichare VJ ku.... VJ miya seena taan ke akele jaao old city ku magar kya hai mu mooch ke rehna... nahi to nuqsaan hojayinga tumhara.... haur kya bolte so...burqe pe to bhul ke bhi nazar nai dalna.... haur agar dalna hi hai to kisi experience waale hyderabadi kuich saath mei leke jaao.... nai to mushkil hojayingi.... wo kya hai na... tum abhi miya bhayo se waaqif nai hai... isiliye mai pailaich bolderu... ab aagey tumari marzi
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Re: kya hai yaaro vj ustaad!!!!!!

by VJ » Tue Aug 29, 2006 4:45 pm

Syed Adil wrote:
dhakkan wrote:hamaare vj bhai tum hyd me rehke barkas ku nai gaye?chalo barkas ku nai gaye toh nai gaye lekin old city ku bhi nai gaye?aray yaaaaro old city jaaaana kaisa bhi mast mazaaa aati lekin zara malumaat wale aadmi ku leke jao nahi toh old city me chutiya banaaane wale bhot rehte mai bhi bana thode baar :lol:


Dhakkan miya tum bhi yaaro khaali peeli darare bichare VJ ku.... VJ miya seena taan ke akele jaao old city ku magar kya hai mu mooch ke rehna... nahi to nuqsaan hojayinga tumhara.... haur kya bolte so...burqe pe to bhul ke bhi nazar nai dalna.... haur agar dalna hi hai to kisi experience waale hyderabadi kuich saath mei leke jaao.... nai to mushkil hojayingi.... wo kya hai na... tum abhi miya bhayo se waaqif nai hai... isiliye mai pailaich bolderu... ab aagey tumari marzi
Arey bhai log, koi hame dikhayega old city? Nazar dalne ke liye nahin balki mujhe nature ka mazaa lena hai. Aur old city ki baat hi alag hoga mere khayaal se. Itni bheed aur bahut saare business, ache aur sasthe khana, aur choti choti galiyan, bahut saare log, aur poora atmosphere hi kuch alag hoga jahan tak ki mai jaanta hu. Yaar tum log tho daraare mujhe. Agar koi aaas paas rahtha hai tho hame batao hum dekhna chahthe hai ki wahan ki khasiyat kya hai. :)



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sollekom bhao logo

by dhakkan » Thu Aug 31, 2006 12:41 am

sollekom namaskaar sat sri akal bhai logo hamaare indiabo bhai nai dikhre kya hua ki bhai ku allah unku achcha rakho....hamaare vj bhai kahaa rehre yaaro tum?tum mehmaan mai mezbaan agar tum naraaz laute hyd. se toh ye hamaare hyd. ki tauheen hogi aur mere liye sharmindagi ki baat!!!!!!tum bole toh old city kya tumhaare ku poora hyd. phiradetau..........apan kya bole toh achche admi hai jaldi mil jaate doosre logo se{ab iske aage apni taareef kya karu mai khud hi...ab aap hi samajh jao mai kitna shareef hu so}hahahahahaha :lol:
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Re: sollekom bhao logo

by VJ » Thu Aug 31, 2006 9:03 am

dhakkan wrote:sollekom namaskaar sat sri akal bhai logo hamaare indiabo bhai nai dikhre kya hua ki bhai ku allah unku achcha rakho....hamaare vj bhai kahaa rehre yaaro tum?tum mehmaan mai mezbaan agar tum naraaz laute hyd. se toh ye hamaare hyd. ki tauheen hogi aur mere liye sharmindagi ki baat!!!!!!tum bole toh old city kya tumhaare ku poora hyd. phiradetau..........apan kya bole toh achche admi hai jaldi mil jaate doosre logo se{ab iske aage apni taareef kya karu mai khud hi...ab aap hi samajh jao mai kitna shareef hu so}hahahahahaha :lol:


Mai yaar New Bowenpally mei Centre Point ke paas rahtha hu. :)
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sollekom bhai logo

by dhakkan » Fri Sep 08, 2006 2:17 pm

aray kya hua yaaro sob logo ku?aisa dikhra barkas ki haleem sukh ko gayi jaisa!!!!!!!!!!hamaaare adil bhai bachiyan dekhne me masroof ho gaye shaayad aur hamaare khan saab afghanistaan ku chale gae ki kya hai ki!!!!!!!!!
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kaha hai bhai sob loga?

by dhakkan » Tue Nov 28, 2006 12:18 pm

salaamalaikum......obaid bhai kaha hai bhai?kaha hai zafar bhai?aray yaaro itta achcha chalri thi yaaro ye thread tum dono post karna ich chodh daale ustaad.......hamaare obaid bhai ye wo threado me to bhi post karrai magar hamaare adil bhai toh ghaib ich ho gae na
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by indiabo » Tue Nov 28, 2006 9:12 pm

Meri jaan dhakkan tumhareku mera naam kaisa maloom hua ji...

Ari achcha mera naam inidiabo bolkey chalra tha...



zara ghor karo ke bhai naam phir se naa bolo kaiku bole to mera computer mere gharwale bhi istemaal karte kabhi dekh liye naam to bolingey potta dekho kaise kaise baatan karta





zara shareef houn boley maaloom bhai...



Waise aap sunaao dhakkan saab kaisa chalra sab theek thaak to hai naa..



kya karoun re bhai zara beech mein dilli gaya phir thoda net sataaya phir bas

forum mein aaya magar mehfil takhliya hogayi thi....

koi nahin



Arey miyan ek potti se baat karna hai tum bolo kaisa shuru karoun



boleto dost ki dost hai me ku pehchaanti magar .......baat nahin hui re bhai



tum experienced hai naa
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hello ev1

by dhakkan » Wed Nov 29, 2006 11:50 am

sollekom indy bhai :lol: .......aray pottiyo ke maamle me to 1st cilaas jaankaari hai dekho apne ku.......ab tumare dost ki dost bole toh woh tumare jo dost hai unu potta hai ya potti hai?aray bhai dono pehchaante ek doosre ku toh ab darne ki baat kya hai?seedha jaana jaake bolna aati kya khandaala? :lol: mazaaq karrau bhai..........hallu hallu baat shuru karna dekho indy bhai fir zara coffe pe jaana fir lunch fir dinner fir aisa hallu hallu karna ji bhai....samajh gae honge tum ab......jai hind bolo aur ghus jao maidaan me :D
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by indiabo » Wed Nov 29, 2006 7:10 pm

Wasalam .



Arey miyan kya boloun mein tumghareku... khissa aisa hai yeh jo potti mere ladkey dost ki dost hai (aashiqui nai hai) bas dost hai boltey.



Ab meri kaiku phat ri boleto meku shak hai yeh mera dost bhi ander se aashiqi karta magar bolta nai yaaa phir aisa bi hosakta ki ....ladki karti aashiqui





bada confusing scenario hai bhai kya bolu .... kabhi une miss call deti kabhi mein detoun magar baat nai hoti ......aur kabhi..........chalo chhodo chaush



Tum kaiku dil pe lete ....



Dhakkan miyan aisa diktha tumhaari umar hai aashiqi ki to karrein hum boley to achchey zaeef hogaye



chalo chhodo tum sunaao
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salaam indy bhai

by dhakkan » Sun Dec 03, 2006 11:33 pm

bhai mere aap ishq ke maamle me kachche khilaadi dikhrai...jaisa padhne ke liye koi umar nai hoti na waisaich ishq karne ki bhi umar nai hoti.........aur miss calla dene ke baad bhi tum baat nai karrai bole toh kya bolu ustaad mai ab!!!!!!mai rehta tha toh doosre din ghar pe pahonch jaatau tha..........aur woh tumaara dost agar aashiqui me hai unse toh lite liyo ustaad apne ku kya karna hai karra toh karne do magar haan tum pehle izhaar kardo agar unhe pehle boldiya toh uski khush kismat aur tumhaari badddddd kismat samjho.....sharmaana chodh daal raaz dil ka khol daal aazu baazu mat dekh i luv u bol daal..........aur indy bhai meri kya aashiqui ki umar hai bhai mai bichaara iskool se ich aashiqui kar lete aarau..ab ek tareeqi ki aadat bangai samjho :lol:
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Re: salaam indy bhai

by indiabo » Mon Dec 04, 2006 10:00 pm

dhakkan wrote:bhai mere aap ishq ke maamle me kachche khilaadi dikhrai...jaisa padhne ke liye koi umar nai hoti na waisaich ishq karne ki bhi umar nai hoti.........aur miss calla dene ke baad bhi tum baat nai karrai bole toh kya bolu ustaad mai ab!!!!!!mai rehta tha toh doosre din ghar pe pahonch jaatau tha..........aur woh tumaara dost agar aashiqui me hai unse toh lite liyo ustaad apne ku kya karna hai karra toh karne do magar haan tum pehle izhaar kardo agar unhe pehle boldiya toh uski khush kismat aur tumhaari badddddd kismat samjho.....sharmaana chodh daal raaz dil ka khol daal aazu baazu mat dekh i luv u bol daal..........aur indy bhai meri kya aashiqui ki umar hai bhai mai bichaara iskool se ich aashiqui kar lete aarau..ab ek tareeqi ki aadat bangai samjho :lol:






hmmmmmm ......



baat patey ki bola mera bhai...



ghor karounga zaroor...



waisey hamaarey amma haj ku jaarein. to tumhareku maloom bas daily ke phoolan, mithai, thumps up, ajmeri khalakhaan khaney ku milra



lash tabiyat hai aaj kal.



Bhai baat samjh mein nahi aati ek jaata haj ku aur ek logan phooolaan pinaatey. chalo faayda abhi hamara hai...



tum bolo koi haj jaarein..
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sollekom indy bhai

by dhakkan » Wed Dec 06, 2006 11:09 pm

hamaare indy bhai sollekom...bhai mere pehle toh mai aapke paira padtau bhai aapke vaalda ku hamaare waastay bhi dua karo bolo bhai mere har koi bolta duao me yaad rakho bolke lekin apan lite le lete lekin bhai plss aap yaad se bolo bhai haj karne wale ki dua allah mian qabool karte aap ka shukr guzaar rahinga mai....aur hamaare yaha bhai ke saas gae haj ku........aur dabaake mithai khaarai bolo chalne do thode dabbe lao na hamaare ghar pe bhi...........aur kaarwaai aagay badhaao bhai pyar ke maamle me der nai karna nai toh mashooka ke bacho ke mama banke reh jaate loga
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by indiabo » Fri Dec 08, 2006 3:02 pm

ur dabaake mithai khaarai bolo chalne do thode dabbe lao na hamaare ghar pe bhi...........


Arey tumhaarey badkey ji. bolo kidhara aake doun.

serious nakko lelo
lol

aur kaarwaai aagay badhaao bhai pyar ke maamle me der nai karna nai toh mashooka ke bacho ke mama banke reh jaate loga




Tu nahin koi aur sahi koi



Koi aur nahi koi aur sahi



Jaanedo dhakkan baba. koi nahi. ab interest bhi nahin raha woh potti.



Waqt har zakhm ka marham banjaataa hai.



Kya boley to aajkal zara busy busy din jaarein isliye.

waisey dhakkan miyan kya boluon tumhareku kal ki baat.



"mera ek khaas dost jo call centre mein kaamkarta aaya aur uskey khisswy hay allah. Kya boloun bhai. Waise woh college dino mein zara achcha tha ab to puchho nakko. ek panjabi ladki k pataya aur uska phone aaya.......kya baatan kara boluon hmmmmmmhuhhhhhh



Pehley pyaar muhabbat ke phir hallu

aashiqui phir bas nangey nangey..........baataan



tum miley to yeh kartoun woh kartoun aur uney bhi chichhori sab kuch sunri aur jawaab deri..........



"





Kya hai bhai .......



Ab ich agar kar kerein pottey to shaadi ke baad kya kartey katey.






waisey

Zafar pehelwaan kahan hai bhai

unka ata hai naa pata hai




i
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solllekom indy bhai

by dhakkan » Fri Dec 08, 2006 11:18 pm

aray indy bhai mai khush ho gaya tha na tum mithaai laarai bolke.....jane do tumaara naam leke mai khud khaaleta dukaan se leke samajhtau indy bhai khilaae.....aur bolrau na indy bhai ye toh kuch bi nai hai tumaaare dost ka bhai pottiya bhot ganday hogae potto ku pottiyan ich bigaadar sahi bolrau.....tumaareku nai malum mai bhot bhot bhot shareef tha ustaad potti jab se mili itta bigad gaya bolrau na bhot bigad gaya baata toh ganday hogaye ich chaale bhi ganday hogae





zafffffar pehelwan kaha hai ustaad mohaale me ladaaai hogayi zara camparmiss{compromise} karaane aao na
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by indiabo » Sat Dec 09, 2006 1:40 am

zafffffar pehelwan kaha hai ustaad mohaale me ladaaai hogayi zara camparmiss{compromise} karaane aao na




kahan hai mama...



Ab tumareku bularein bolkey posa maarrein ...........
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sollkom bhai logo

by dhakkan » Sat Dec 09, 2006 12:40 pm

hello....hw r u?hw do u do?now u do!!!!!!.........zafar pehelwan ku jaake barkas me se leke aana padhinga mereku........hamaare indy bhai kaiku intrest nai raha yaaro ye sob cheezo me tumaareku{i mean tum bole na pottiyo me intrest nai hai bolke}..........intrest rehtai nai bhai aa jaata, intrest liyo tum bhi zara ye ich umar hai sob karne ki uske baad biwi bachche khatam zindagi madari ke dhol pe naachne wale bandar ban jaana padhta..........toh ab ich practise kare toh biwi ku qaboo me rakh saktay nai toh nikal gai na haath se toh bhot sataati biwi.
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by indiabo » Sun Dec 10, 2006 1:48 am

hello....hw r u?hw do u do?now u do!!!!!!......




Nai hota dhakkan bhai....pataana boleyto planning karna padta.... aur ab planning kartey baithey to agey unplanned hojaatey.



Aur rahi baat interest ki ...... to suno meri jaan



Actually hum bahot hi egoist aadmi hai potti ke maamley mein.



Ab ramzaan ki baat lelo...Ek potti mili interview mein thoda baat hui phir directly phone number deliye... ek haftey tak time pass messagan diye bas uskey baad diwali aayi aur une ek mere message ka reply nahi di...........





Aur mainey bhi kabhi nahi contact nahi kiya... agar koi hota to woh 100% waisi ladki ko impress karta but u c bhai hm aisey hi hain...
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sollekom

by dhakkan » Wed Dec 13, 2006 1:54 pm

FHDB ke sabhi yaatriyo ko mera namaskaar,aadaab,sat sri akal,aur hello...........kripya apni apni sat belt baandhle kyu ki barkas ki haleem ki udaan ab barkas jaane ke liye tayyar hai zafar pehelwaan ko laane :lol: ............indy bhi tum chalaao na plane ye :D ........EGOISTIC rehna apan bhot achchi baat hai khaali pottiyo ku haq hai kya egoistic rehne ka?apne ku bi baraabar haq hai........mai toh boltau pottiyo ku nok pe rakhna :lol:{mai gusse me aa gaya toh aur bure bure baat bol detau ye pottiyo ku kaiku boletoh bhot sataae mereku pottiya}.......ab apan bhi kkiraak hogae nok pe rakhrai sob ku toh sab right hai ek dum...
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by indiabo » Wed Dec 13, 2006 2:39 pm

*Bee jaan bee:::



Arey nai ji dhoolan amma . yeh jo jo dhakkan hai naa...



*dulhan amma: kaun dhakkan ? kiski baat kaari tu?



*bee jaan bee: arey woich chhichora jo FHDB ke chaurastey pe reahta so.arey woh barkas ki haleem mein inidiabo aur zafar pehelwan ke saath matarqashi kartey rehta so ji .



*dhoolan amma: arey arey woh londora..maththi pado uspo . chaubees ghantey aadi baadi phirtey rehta ...galli ki har potti pe lightan maarte rehta....



Ab kal kich baat lelo bushra ki potti jo jawaan hogayi dekho.......



*bee jaan bee: kaun wo jo puri jaya prada ki jaisi hai so naa ......



Dhoolan amma: haan unech....dhakkan motorcycle pe aakey wo stylean maara bas kya bouloun aur une besharam raand bhi khoob chaandni pe se

dekhri thi/............



Mai boli khuda ke waastey idhar nakko karo re tum logan......jawaani aagayi to woh naye shehar me jaake karo .......idhar karey to shareef pottey pottiyan ko bhi chool uththi.......











To be continue by dhakkan
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story part 2

by dhakkan » Wed Dec 13, 2006 11:26 pm

indiabo wrote:*Bee jaan bee:::

Arey nai ji dhoolan amma . yeh jo jo dhakkan hai naa...

*dulhan amma: kaun dhakkan ? kiski baat kaari tu?

*bee jaan bee: arey woich chhichora jo FHDB ke chaurastey pe reahta so.arey woh barkas ki haleem mein inidiabo aur zafar pehelwan ke saath matarqashi kartey rehta so ji .

*dhoolan amma: arey arey woh londora..maththi pado uspo . chaubees ghantey aadi baadi phirtey rehta ...galli ki har potti pe lightan maarte rehta....

Ab kal kich baat lelo bushra ki potti jo jawaan hogayi dekho.......

*bee jaan bee: kaun wo jo puri jaya prada ki jaisi hai so naa ......

Dhoolan amma: haan unech....dhakkan motorcycle pe aakey wo stylean maara bas kya bouloun aur une besharam raand bhi khoob chaandni pe se
dekhri thi/............

Mai boli khuda ke waastey idhar nakko karo re tum logan......jawaani aagayi to woh naye shehar me jaake karo .......idhar karey to shareef pottey pottiyan ko bhi chool uththi.......





To be continue by dhakkan




dhoolan amma:toh wo awaara kya jawaab diya malum mereku?



bee jaan bee:kya bola toh bhi?



dhoolna amma:mathi pado uspo mereku bolra tumaari choti potti jawaan hogai usku chaandni po bhejo bolra..mai boli maathi mile tere moo me keede pado...uske baad mereku ultha poochra tumaari badi beti kiske saath toh bi bhaag gai jo itte dino se nai dikhri katay



bee jaan bee:ai tum wo iflaas ke moo ku nakko lago.......aur tum khaali ye dhakkan ke harakkata dekh ko aisa bolrai wo indiabo bi kuch kam nai hai....unhe ich hai potta meri potti ku line marra tha so...raato ku fona karra....mereku toh aisa dikhra meri potti ku bhagaa ko leke jaata ki kya hai ki.......



dhoolan amma:in logo ka aana jaana bandh karaa dena basti me.....



bee jaan bee:kaisa bandh kaarate ji tum unlogo ka basti me aana jaana bandh...unhe hai na apni basti ka lathor zafar unlogo ka dost....



dhoolan amma:ai wo zafar ka naam nakko le mere samme......



bee jaan bee:kya hua gay dhoolan kaiku aisa bolri toh bhi?



dhoolan amma:baaday ke hammam me mai gai hammam ku,bee aapa tumaara ku toh malum kaisa hai woh hammam ka darwaaza......iflaas aako darwaaza khol ko bhaag gaya poore baaday ke chotay potte pottiya dekhko mereku khil khil hasrai thay saara din



ab tum likho indy bhai...
LiFe SuCkS!!!sO Do I!!!!!
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